Another new phase of life.. Career or something bigger?

Hi me, my self and I,

LOL... considering yang baca blog ini adalah aku aku dan aku lagi ..
actually aku menulis juga memang untuk healing , bukan untuk dibaca orang lain
Well.. it's been 2 years since my last post.. what have happened? A LOT!
Why didn't I write it down? Simply maybe not that stressful until I need this writing therapy.

I am married now.
And guess what? I'm expecting.. in less than a month harusnya anak yang lagi nemenin aku nulis di dalem perut ini sdh lahir. Am I ready? Don't know.

Well, sebenarnya kenapa aku kembali menulis hari ini?
Simply Quincy is being Quincy...
Si ambisius ini sedang galau, lantaran dia gak dipromote tahun ini, while temen-temen sejawatnya smua dipromote. Mengapa promosi itu menjadi penting, padahal gaji lo naik? Well, I need recognition. Makin ksini gw makin merasa kebutuhan recognition ini yang bikin stress..

Ada perasaan, capek aja jadi cunguk mulu... jadi babu mulu hahaha.. belum bs masuk ranah yang lebih strategis.. masiih beda strata dengan para manager2..
Gw mikir, gw berkejaran dengan waktu.. momen2 mau ambi itu terakhir ya sebelum anak ini lahir. Mungkin tahun lalu performa gw blm layak untuk dipromosi, then apalagi tahun depan??

Tahun dimana prioritas pertama gw seharusnya anak ini.
Tahun dimana seharusnya aku udah bisa bilang cukup ke HP untuk berinteraksi langsung sama anakku.
Tahun dimana seharusnya aku harus bisa bilang cukup ketika emang waktunya harus pulang karena anakku udah nunggu di rumah..

Everyone has their own season.. yang mungkin bikin ini menjadi sedikit berat lantaran rasanya kita sendiri.. feeling alone and somehow lonely.
Cerita ke suami, yang tipenya bukan ngejar karir.. jawabannya simpel banget "Fokus dulu, enjoy aja dulu". Tapi dia sama sekali gak salah. Itu benar, in a way itu juga yang aku nantikan.

Pengen istirahat. Sebentar.

Namun gak bs bohong. Aku masih punya ambisi dan aku takut terhenti.

Orang bilang, "But you will have something bigger than career, a lifetime job as a mom, as parents. You'll grow a human"
Setuju..
Cuma boleh gak kalo aku tetep nyesek..
Boleh gak kalau aku tetep bilang, tapi aku juga kepengen namanya disebut pas promosi, aku juga kepengen dapet award karyawan berprestasi, aku juga pengen dapet recognition...

Then, some of you may ask.. are you regret?
NOT AT ALL!
This baby is a bless.. jujur anak ini gak pernah nyusahin selama di perut. Dia ngerti banget mamanya suka kerja, dia supportif banget. Kadang aku suka merasa gak fair, jarang banget bisa ada waktu deep talk. Mamanya suka banget ngomong sama orang, tapi kadang suka bingung dan males ngajak dia ngmg, sibuk bales2in WA atau main sosmed.

Dear Baby R yang masih di perut,

We may not meet each other yet, but please know that you are loved. Mama tahu kamu akan mengubah duniaku, prioritasku, dan segalanya tentang aku. Aku gak bisa janjiin aku untuk jadi Ibu yang sempurna, aku mungkin masih punya egoku, tapi satu hal sayang, I will never let you feel less loved. Dalam setiap keputusan yang akan aku ambil, selalu ada kamu dan papa kamu sebagai prioritas. Ry, kamu sehat-sehat terus yaaaa, selalu aktif dan lincah anakku yang pinter.. Mama akan belajar jadi manusia yang lebih baik buat kamu. Oiah, maaf ya kalo lately aku sering cengeng, dikit2 nangis gak jelas.. Anak cowok yang kuat yaaa... See you when I see you.. 

Another new chapter of life..

Setelah sekian lama tidak update, jadi ingin sharing-sharing lagi..
Karena sekarang hidup gw isinya kerjaan doank jadi ya beginilah yaaa...
Okay, intinya I'm going to move to a new place lagi. Apakah itu???
It's an e-commerce.....

Well, thank you FH..
You've taught me a lot and I owe you indeed.
Banyak banget sih moment2 yang sangat berkesan, ups and downs semuaaaaaaaaa..
hahahhahhaa

I just wanna recap my moment with FH for this 1 year and 10 months:
1. Seneng banget baru seminggu udh ikut kelas di Indoestri
2. Hmm.. Pertama kali dimarahin boss di 3 minggu kerja karena salah bales email hahaa..
3. Waktu itu sempet ajak Anin ke kantor untuk ikutan Mind Snack
4. Peluncuran new brand ambassador of L'Oreal Paris
5. The AHA moment ketika dapet ide "Life Begins at 30".. kayak pengen joget-joget gituu..
6. Pertama kali jadi MC di acara KASKUS, ketemu koko Dion..
7. PR Box Listerine Zero dan tragedi ditemukannya gambar "the stinky feet" jam 11 malam
8. Vanish MURI Record, the one and only deehh..
9. Waktu akhirnya Mbak Alma buy in sama ide "Seeing is believing" buat 1on1 storynya Ratan. Sampe mewek..
10. Mendadak Oo sakit jadi harus gantiin Oo handle Listerine Berbagi Senyum.. Sungguh sesuatu..
11. Drama of Lebaran 2016
12. Berani Matahari jugaa gilaaa... waktu itu idenya udah mentok akhirnya sampe jam 11 discuss di Meat Me
13. Outing to Taman Safari with Social Consumer Team
14. Get inspired by the female scientist at L'Oreal Roundtable Discussion with Dr. Ines Atmosukarto and Mbak Fenny M. Dwivanny.
15. First business trip to Changi Airport, waktu itu bawa media utk Pokemon Year-End celebration
16. Setiap kali dapet artikel dari KOHLER media alert
17. LI Pitching.. pressurenya itu lhoooooo...
18. One fine brunch with Maudy Ayunda at Paul
19. A call from MM..
20. I got promoted!
21. Win a pitch for BCIF!
22. GPS Training in Singapore
23. L'Oreal Science Fair #TernyataSainsKeren
24. Dikontak sama dr. Kevin Maharis karena dia puas sama kerjaan kita dulu.

Will update terusss yaaa...
Se-stress2nya aku kerja di sini tapi banyak sekali kenangan indah yang aku dapet..

Thank you FH..

P.S Cheerful ranger: Whenever you are, be the true you and shine..

2 Mei 2017

Today is such a long day.
A day that I finally convey to myself, this is the time. This is more than enough.
This just may not my last destination but thank you for the lessons and journey, it indeed taught me a lot about the profession, client's nature, the industry and etc.
I can no longer handle all pressure.
What can you do when your good is not good enough?
Too bad, I have to say that I quit but I do.

hahaha.. one more time I sing this song..

Get it Right

What have I done?

I wish I could run,

Away from this ship going under

Just trying to help out everyone else

Now I feel the weight of the world is on my shoulders

What can you do when your good isn't good enough

And all that you touch tumbles down?

'Cause my best intentions

Keep making a mess of things

I just wanna fix it somehow

But how many times will it take?

Oh, how many times will it take for me to get it right, to get it right?

Can I start again, with my fate again?

'Cause I can't go back and endure this

I just have to stay and face my mistakes,

But if I get stronger and wiser, I'll get through this

What can you do when you're good isn't good enough?

And all that you touch tumbles down?

'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things

I just…

Cheerful ranger is not cheerful tonight..

Good nite..

Tiga Jenis Laki-laki yang akan Ditemui Setiap Perempuan

Hi..
Sudah lama sekali tidak ngepost.. mungkin karena selama ini kebanyakan nulis di kantor.. wkwkww... anw, been a while since my last post but really I wanna share a very thoughtful post yang pas banget sama aku..

Here you go!

THE 3 MEN EVERY GIRL DATES

When I was a little girl, I had a very simple notion of love. He’d be tall, dark and handsome. But growing up, I was told there were many different types of men – the Bad boy, Mr. Nice Guy, the Alpha Male. The list goes on. These categories are nothing more than meaningless stereotypes. In life, every girl really only dates three men:

1. Youth – the right person you meet at the wrong time

He’s the one who wrote you love letters. He’s the one who tried to get your number at school. He’s the one who won your heart through childish means. He’s the one you took long train/bus rides with. He’s the one who stole all your firsts – your first date, your first hand-hold, your first kiss, your first walk home, your first couple item. But he is also the first you lose. Not because you didn’t love him. But because growing up, you realize that in life, some stay and others go, and that sometimes we don’t just grow up, we also grow apart. Youth – he was your first lover. He was your first heartbreak.

2. Love – the right person you meet at the right time

He’s the stranger-turned-best friend. He’s the one that made you realize why things didn’t work out previously. He’s the one that made the past heartbreak(s) worthwhile.

He’s the boy who doesn’t just send you home, but enters home hand-in-hand with you. He’s the boy you date at home. The one you cuddle at home while watching movies. He’s the one you’d even bother watching soccer for. He’s the one who holds your hand in town when you’re all glamorously made up but he’s also the one who cuddles you when you’re in bed without make up. He’s the one you grow up with. You know it it’s true when you witness how dates switched from crowded bus/train rides to a private ride in his car.

Unlike Youth, Love knows you inside out. He always knows when you need a shoulder to lean on, an ear to rant to, or a hand to reach out to. He’s the boy you’re proud to bring home to your parents. He’s protective like your father, annoying like your brother but loving like no other. He’s the boy you see a future with. He’s the boy you willingly forsake all other boys for. For the lucky girl, Love is also the boy you grow old with. For the average girl, Love simply is the one that got away.

3. Marriage – the wrong person you meet at the right time

If you’re the girl who got to marry and grow old with Love, stop here. For Love = Marriage and the rest is irrelevant to you. If not, read on.He’s the financially stable one. He’s the career man. He’s the one who wakes up donned in a work suit and oxfords. He may not surprise you like Love did. He may not excite you like Youth did. He may not be as cute and dashing as Youth or as fun and passionate as Love, but for once in your life, you worry less about growing apart while growing up. For once in your life, you’re less worried about baring yourself to someone only to be torn apart.

By the time you meet Marriage, you recognize love isn’t sufficient to sustain a relationship. You recognize that fun and looks don’t last. By the time you meet Marriage, you’ve gone through sufficient heartbreaks to want to be spared another.

Marriage is ultimately the one you spend the rest of your life with. Not because he’s passionate, not because being with him is fun but because he’s what you need – the stable partner who publicly promises to grow old with you, in illness or health, riches or poor, for better or worse.

A lot of us believe true love is about finding the “Right” one. But true love really is more a matter of timing. He may have been right at 19 but he may no longer be the right one at 27. More often than not, we lose our loved ones because we grow apart while growing up.

Just like how time made wrong your relationship with Mr. Right, time too can make right “the wrong one”. And with time, you realize Marriage wasn’t the right one at the right time, because he is the right one forever.

http://jcheongwrites.com/the-3-men-every-girl-dates/ 

Thank you for writing such an on-point article..

P.S Cheerful Ranger hari ini:

Everything comes to you at the right time.  Be patient.

Renungan malam teruntuk adik Jeffry dan Hana

It's been a long time since my last post..
Well, life's changed hahhaa.. Banyak hal yang belum terekam dalam jejak kata-kata dalam blog ini dan sejujurnya aku pun sudah tak bertenaga menuliskannya satu per satu.. namun coba kuringkas dalam sebuah cerita yah..

Dalam blog ini secara khusus ingin kusampaikan untuk dua adik kesayangan, Jeffry dan Hana.. mereka dua adik yang kukenal sejak masa kuliah.. bersama kita berbagi dan bertumbuh di klub Bahasa Inggris di UMN.. dua- duanya punya prestasi yang sangat membanggakan.. Hana terpilih sebagai perwakilan PPIKOR tahun 2014 dan sekarang sedang ambil gelar master di Belanda. Jeffry, si maniak exchange kemarin ini ikut PPIK tahun 2014 dan AKAN ke Taiwan juga buat lanjut sekolah.. So proud of you guyss..

Okay pasti kalian bingung apa maksud blog ini yahhh.. Well, keep reading then!

Setelah beberapa lama tidak ngobrol panjang, malam ini aku ketemuan sama Cink.. cukup happy karena tadi meetingnya cepet selesai makanya bisa langsung lanjut ngobrol hehe.. Well, intinya as usual kita mengupdate kehidupan sih.. ngomong heart to heart.. #halah..

Tapi ada satu hal yang bikin aku agak tersentuh dan merefleksikan apa yang Cink sampaikan..

Cink: "Ci.. kemaren pas gw ketemu Jeffry dia bilang "Sedih deh Ci Quin yang gw kenal sudah berubah, dia udh bukan cici princess yang punya mimpi sekolah di luar negeri.. Sekarang dia udah realistis.. Padahal gw sama Hana jadi bermimpi tinggi karena Ci Quin."

Me: ....

Well.. jujur sepenggal kalimat itu membuatku berpikir..
Berpikir sejenak.. Do I change?
Am I no longer a dreamer??

Thank you Jeff and Hana..
Thank you Cink..
Thank you for letting me take a side time to think about myself..

Hampir tiga tahun menjejaki dunia kerja sebagai budak korporasi.. ternyata tanpa sadar aku sudah lama tidak bernapas, untuk berpikir tentang aku dan anganku..

Well,, if I may say.. My life (except my weight) now is pretty much what I want to be..
Dulu ketika sedang menyusun rencana hidup yang aku ingat betul aku pernah bilang:
"Pokoknya gue mau kerja di PR consulting, alasannya biar kursus akselerasi, cepet belajar across industry and clientele. Trus after 2-3 years gw mau pindah ke industry biar masuknya langsung mid level, habis itu mau cari beasiswa syukur2 dibayarin kantor mau S2 di US. In the end, after 10 years I wish I could be quoted in the mass media as the head of communication of PT XXX. I am the face of the company lalalallalallala.." 

"Gw mau jadi wanita karir, kerja di gedung tinggi, kantoran cantik, ketemu banyak klien, ngomong campur2 bahasa Inggris, coba2 tempat2 baru, travelling at least once a year, beli barang2 yang gw mau beli by my own.."

Then.. Harusnya aku bersyukur..
That's exactly what I'm doing right now..

But then again, is that enough? Tetep aja manusia ngeluhnya tetep aja ada..
Stress klien, stress pressure, stress gak bs survive, stress karena  intinya REALITA itu gak seindah MIMPI.

well.. skrg aku memang lagi stress2nya kerja.. stress2nya mengatasi  bahwa EKSPEKTASI tak sesuai REALISASI..

Masih ak ingat siang itu, makan siang bersama Jeffry di Kokas setelah sekian lama tak bersua.. Pembicaraan hari itu memang terasa flat dan dingin.. Ak tak seantusias biasanya, lebih ke flat, bahkan agak terburu2 mengingat harus segera balik ke kantor.. I was so boring hahahaha... That's why he said I have changed..

Malam ini.. aku punya kesempatan untuk berpikir..

Dear Jeff and Han,

Aku masih Ci Quin yang sama kok.. Aku masih punya mimpi.. Even bigger than ever.. Hanya memang prioritasnya berbeda, aku tak seluang dulu untuk memilih, but I have more than enough options to choose.. Bersyukurlah kalian yang masih bisa menjalankan apa yang kalian impikan and make it your best, as always! 

Dulu gw punya mimpi pengen bisa ikut exchange ke luar negeri..
Dulu gw punya mimpi pengen jadi praktisi PR terkenal perusahaan besar..
Tapi.. realita mengajarkan dan memberitahukan bahwa the objective is not as shallow as that.. Objectivenya bukan sekolah di luar negerinya, objektifnya bukan jadi PRnya.. Objectivenya adalah untuk membuktikan bahwa we can be anything and nothing's impossible.. Walaupun titik akhirnya bukan seperti yang kita rencanakan but always make it our best! That's my dream..

I thought I wanna be PR of a great company, what I know right now I wanna be PR of myself who can speak and stand out for my self my own brand. I wanna be a lecturer because I'd love to share with my students but what I realize I'd love to share with anyone.. That's why I'm saying my dream is even bigger than ever.. I'm really excited to see what's I'm going to face in the future, what kind of surprise's waiting for me.. Universe has bigger plan that you thought! (will share in more detail in next post)

So Jeffry and Hana, thank you so much for reminding me to keep on dreaming... I am.. I will.. 
Good luck and my best wishes for you both yah! I believe you can be anything you want.. and am looking forward to your inspiring stories and experience di sana :) 

Once again, thank you..
Thank you juga ci cong fan yang sdh menjadi great messenger.. 

Cheers,
Quincy

cuma boleh makan buah

Cuma boleh makan buah
mama bilang 4 bulan makan buah saja
supaya kurus
supaya cantik

Starting over is always lame.
semangat semangat!

Smoga kali ini ada titik terang..

Master of Communication

Welcome 2016,
masih tetap dengan diet abadi dan mimpi baru..
I'm sure I will earn my Master degree in Communication in the US or Aussie or UK..

Semangat!
Start to learn English, prepare for the admission :)

Jia you!

hahaha..
I have no idea what will happen in the next 3 months, but I know in the next 3 years I will be someone in PR industry..

XOXO,
Quinnie